The action never stops on campus – and it’s been some time since we’ve had some true crime reports on Wonkhe. This time, I’ve focused on the many and varied non-human inhabitants of the university. In recent times our outstanding security staff have had to cope with ever more challenging situations involving all creatures great and small.
There are many examples previously published here in more than 50 editions of True Crime on Campus, the very best of which appear in the book of the same name.
Of course our security team deals with much more than the incidents reported here. Similar services are performed by security teams at universities across the country. Everyone in the sector has much to be thankful to them for.
Puppy love
2105 Report of a lost puppy adjacent to Hall, Security Officers were asked to look out for the animal.
1910 Report of a bat in the Chemistry Building, Security attended, the Building was checked but no bat was found.
1015 Intruder alarm Woolpack House – cause of activation was Pigeons in the Building. Security attended and removed one of the Pigeons. Estates Help Desk to be informed and arrange for report of broken windows.
0834 Report of a female walking a large dog on the Downs off its lead. Officers attended and on arrival the female was abusive towards Officers and threatened them that the dog would attack them. The female was told to put her dog on a lead and leave Campus.
1720 Report of a bat flying around Psychology, Security attended and after taking advice from Bat Rescue were able to get the bat to go outside.
0845 Report of a sheep out of its field at Sutton Bonington Campus. Security attended and the Sheep was returned to its field.
A swan? Go on
0830 Report of a swarm of bees in Pope Building. Security attended, Estates Help Desk informed.
0937 Report of a dead hedgehog on Jubilee Avenue, Estates Help Desk informed.
0900 Report of a dog running loose on the University Park. Security attended Science Site. The dog was caught by a Building Attendant. The Dog Warden was requested to attended and the Dog was taken away at 1100.
1550 Report of a dead swan on the lake at Jubilee Campus. The RSPCA were informed.
0654 Report of a dog found on Campus. The owner of the dog reported losing the Dog on Campus. Security Officers were able to reunite the owner with their dog.
1535 Report of persons hare coursing on University Farm land adjacent to Sutton Bonington Campus. Security attended, on arrival Farm Staff had already told the males to leave.
1950 Report of a dead duck on the lakeside pathway at Jubilee Campus. Security attended, the Duck was removed and disposed of.
1610 Report of sheep loose in Kingston on Soar, Security attended with the Farm Manager.
Cat naps
1825 Report of a dog left in a vehicle which was parked on Sutton Bonington Campus. Security attended the dog was not found to be in distress.
2200 Report of flying ants in Hall, Security and Hall Porter attended. The Hall Porter used fly spray to reduce the numbers of insects. Estates Help Desk to be informed.
1620 Report that a student had fallen from their horse adjacent to the Vet School, Security attended and on arrival officers were told that the student had gone back to their term address with a friend. This was against the advice given by Vet School Staff. The student stated that they would attend Hospital. The student has contacted Security to say they have been to Hospital and released with mild concussion.
1830 Report of a cat up a tree adjacent to Hall, Security attended, the cat was coaxed down.
0420 Security spoke to a male on Jubilee Campus who had a fishing rod with him. The male denied he was going to go fishing and left the Campus.
Dearing report
15:05 Report of a trapped bird in the Dearing Building. Security and Grounds attended to remove the bird.
0750 Report of a pigeon in Gateway Building, Security attended, the pigeon was caught and escorted from the building.
1510 Report of a person being bitten by a dog adjacent to Jubilee Campus Conference Centre.
1405 Report of an injured magpie adjacent to Coates Building, Security attended, Vet School staff attended and collected the bird.
1450 Report of a dead pigeon in the Lake adjacent to Business School North. Security attended, Estates Help Desk to be informed.
2055 Report of a large black poodle running loose adjacent to Hall. Security attended but the poodle could not be located.
0050 Intruder alarm. Security attended, on arrival Officers found that the cause of the activation was rats in the building eating packets of crisps. Estates Help Desk is to be informed.
1230 Report that a fishbowl with fish intestines had been left at the reception of Biomolecular Science, Security attended and are to follow up.
1523 Report of the theft of equipment belonging to the Bee Keeper. Security attended, Police informed.
A place of feline safety
1750 Report of kittens in a wooded area adjacent to Hall, Security attended, Officers located the kittens which were then taken to a place of safety. At 2045 another kitten was located and also taken to a place of safety by Security.
2315 Report that a student driving back to Sutton Bonington had been in collision with a deer. At 0045 the student informed Security that they had brought the deer back to Campus and called the RSPCA.
1830 Report of a swarm of bees in Hall, Security attended, Estates Help Desk to be informed.
1516 Report that a family playing crazy golf adjacent to DHL had been stung by wasps. Security attended, the wasp nest is on Council property and will be dealt with by the Council.
1245 Report of a rabbit feeling unwell adjacent to the Vet School. Security attended but on arrival the Rabbit had died. Officers disposed of the Rabbit.
1800 Report of ants in Biomolecular Science. Security attended and spoke to staff in the building and also the Building Manager. There was some concern about the ants affecting an experiment. There is no call out for Pest Control at the weekend so this will be followed up on Monday.
20:20 Report of a conference delegate sustaining an injury at Hall during a game of ‘bulldog’. Ambulance attended and took the delegate to Hospital. Conference Office informed.
If you’ve enjoyed this or any of the previous editions of True Crime on Campus then you’ll be keen to get hold of the moderately popular book of the same name. You can order it for only a fiver (yes, just £5) directly from the University of Nottingham online shop or from Amazon if you prefer as well as on Kindle. The book includes an outstanding selection of the many hundreds of bizarre, unfortunate, inexplicable and just plain weird campus crime reports have appeared over the years.
At least half of any profits from the sale of this book will be given to support the Children’s Brain Tumour Research Centre at the University of Nottingham to create a brighter future for children with brain tumours. You can find out more about the work of the Centre here.
‘Report of a rabbit feeling unwell adjacent to the Vet School. Security attended but on arrival the Rabbit had died.’ There’s a story in there (the rabbit was ‘feeling’ unwell – how did they know, did it leave a note?) but just on its own it made me howl with laughter! Thank you.